Boards is at out of my hands for now but I'm having a hard time letting it go. Between the uncertainty of my score actually counting and the uncertainty that I actually passed, I'm giving myself permission to take a couple days to go through the Stages of Grief gradually and not feel 100% on vacation right away.
That said, I'm so so ready for a vacation. These next two weeks I get to go to Santa Barbara, Irvine (Boyfriend's moving closer!), and home to Oregon for Emma's high school graduation (sister number 2).
And then...I start third year with a surgery rotation. It will be hard to stay relaxed through that, but I do have this to look forward to:
Sarah at theShuBox has planned a blog-led Virtual Summer Retreat that starts on Monday and goes for 6 weeks, through the first part of July. Check it out and follow along! We all need a little recouping and a chance to refocus.
All right, let's talk detox. I don't know why, but it always makes me think of smoothies:
No I'm not going on a smoothie diet. This is detox light. Some things to address:
a. I've been living with pretty much steady caffeine drip for the past month, and was completely okay with it through Boards. Now, however, it's time to break that habit. I hate being actually addicted to anything.
b. I've been handling my poor food/stress relationship with good and bad days, but it's left me feeling just sort of beat up. Either I'm eating something that doesn't leave me feeling great, or I'm resisting the urge to eat something that won't leave me feeling great and either way it leaves me tired.
c. Then there's exercise. Goodness gracious. Exercise has been a little bit built-in with Nora but I haven't been riding every day, and it doesn't really give the same endorphin rush as a good run. I just sacrificed a bit of working out for especially the last 2 weeks to maximize the study time. So I'm feeling the need to properly sweat.
Conveniently the first week of the Virtual Summer Retreat focuses on the inside/out (self-care and body) - exactly what's missing here.
So, while I'm excited to see what kinds of ideas and reflections Sarah will bring us, I'm also instating a couple of my own guidelines to get me back to feeling great.
Post-Boards Detox/Feel Better Guidelines
a. Caffeine: No caffeine for a week. After that I'll reinstate black tea and 2x weekly coffee, because I love them, but that's my usual level that doesn't have me addicted.
b. Food: In terms of food, I want to write a separate post, because I've been thinking a lot about intuitive eating, listening to my body, recognizing hunger signals etc. but I still have some more internal processing to do before it's ready for a post. For now I'll refer you over to Megan, who's been doing some great posts about her own intuitive eating journey, and tell you I'm just planning to eat well. The point is, there are no guidelines specific to the food I want to eat now , because it's a goal of cutting down the restrictions.
Also, I know I crave much better things when I'm properly exercising and taking care of myself mentally, so this is a good time for me to consciously take a look at my eating intuition.
c. Exercise: Run at least 3x a week and strength train at least 2x a week for the next 3 weeks. Once surgery rotation starts I'll set some exercise goals based on my actual rotation and time available. I'm expecting to mostly live in the hospital, so I'm putting off setting any concrete goals until I can evaluate their realisticality <-- not previously a word, but it ought to be.